Frustration… mostly.
I was able to get the cellphone situation sorted out after another call to T-Mobile. By talking to a supervisor’s supervisor… they finally gave me the same sort of deal that a brand new customer would receive; I did have to direct them to the website to look to see that I wasn’t “mistaken” or lying for that matter. The new phone will be a Nokia 3595, another relatively cheap though functional phone… I’ll probably need to get another cover for it though, as I’m sure it has the trademark ugly as sin one on it right now. It is being sent via the postal service so I’m not really sure when I’ll get it — the first time I got a phone from them it came from a nearby location in Maryland, so I’m hoping this time it will also. I’m semi-hoping to get it today (Tuesday), but I won’t be too disappointed when it doesn’t show until later in the week.
It’s incredibly frustrating and… uncomfortable to not have a cellphone. It’s really strange how dependent I am on this little piece of technology, I rather feel like my life has come to a grinding halt.
Patrick has been working a lot of overtime lately so I’ve not really seen him much, but there really isn’t anything I can do about that. I’m not really feeling the drive up there lately either though, particularly after working all day outside usually. Especially now when I’m relatively helpless in communication terms if something should happen. It just sort of overall sucks right now.
Sam’s prom… I really don’t know what’s going on there. I’ve been having doubts about going, for a multitude of reasons. Deep down I really want to be there, but I’m just having doubts about it… sort of paranoia and worry, etc. I can’t really explain it. Financially, yes, I can do it… but I probably shouldn’t, because I want to get back on ‘track’ with everything. I can always put that off until next month though, it really isn’t that big of a deal. The data centre keeps changing when my bill is due and that certainly isn’t helping. In March I didn’t get my invoice until toward the end of the month, last month (April) I didn’t even get an invoice, so I paid it toward the end of the month, and then I just now got an invoice for May that is “due upon receipt” instead of due within ten days, etc, like normal. If I were to pay it upon receipt that means I definitely couldn’t buy the plane ticket to go see Sam anyway. Of course, then there is the whole issue of making sure it would be okay with his family, something he’s been procrastinating about quite a bit… which has been rather worrisome. Add to that, which I’ve known about anyway, he has all sorts of other things going on around that time too; it all leads me to think it’d be best to just call the whole thing off. The sort of stress around that visit is starting to remind me of Davey’s visit… ugh.
I guess Jon is back, I’ve not heard from him in any manner though… I guess it was two or so weeks ago, maybe less, that he was trying to arrange something whenever he’d get back around the first… Bleh… There could be a message from him on my voicemail, but considering I can’t remember my password to get my messages I haven’t a clue… perhaps that’s wishful thinking anyway. I’m not happy with him… he’s not so much a friend anymore, just someone I know.
I’ve also not spoken with Chris or Luke lately at all… I can blame it on my being busy, and not being online at the same time, etc… but whatever, I don’t know if it’s me or what; as they say, it works both ways. I know that I need constant attention… or I just sort of… forget about people; if I don’t forget I lose the desire to do anything about it.
Overall, I think I’m just unhappy in general. It’s like something in me just sort of ’switched’ off a couple of weeks ago while at that Sushi party at Scott’s… I just got grumpy and I’ve not really been ungrumpy since then… thus I’ve funnelled my energy into working outside. It’s been productive at least, even if I’ve let the inside of the house sort of… decline. I desperately need to do laundry, or at least somehow get it off the floor, heh.
In terms of plants and such, I now have a clay pot herb garden going on, it’s on the deck. I think, counting ones I’ve not potted up yet, I have about 24 pots worth… heh, which is rather a lot. My Dahlias are doing quite nicely, especially the red ones, the leaves span the entire pot’s diameter. Pretty much everything in the cutting garden has sprouted up, whoo!
I also started a rose garden, I have five different roses, mostly hybrid teas, but also a bourbon and a floribunda. We got a park bench the other night and I put it together yesterday and sat it out there. That area will, potentially, be rather wonderful toward the end of summer, I definitely look forward to it. Since all of that didn’t seem like enough, heh, that’s why I started that herb garden thing, plants that smell good, flower, and are useful in cooking… can’t go wrong there. I also dug up another big chunk of the back lawn to plant watermelons, cantalope, tomatoes, and peppers. I want to get some strawberries to go in there too, unfortunately the ones at the walmart garden center looked extremely sickly so I passed on that tonight.
I also dug up the front beds and ammended them with manure, peat moss, and topsoil… not nearly as difficult as it could have been because I tilled it last summer. Lastnight we went to Lowe’s and Walmart to get the plants that go in there… my little vision wasn’t exactly registering with the woman though, as she bought lots of bush and shrub type plants and wasn’t particularly interested in getting the perennial flowering plants that I’d wanted. It’s okay though, I guess, because any sort of plant is better than weedy dirt! I think she figured it would be easier to fill in with the flowers.
I think one of my ‘little’ goals is to fill most of the backyard with plantings of some sort so that it won’t need to be mowed, heh. I’ve been thinking of taking the broken sidewalk/patio concrete and sort of scattering it about in the rose garden… then planting some sort of creeping thing there, some sort of groundcover, etc. I won’t bother with that for a while though, it can definitely wait. I just want to get all of the planting done, especially stuff that needs to grow and mature to be useful, like herbs, fruits, veggies, roses, stuff from seed. All the “hardscaping” can definitely wait and really isn’t terribly necessary.
My indoor grass has reached “mowing height” …with some of the seeds still starting though, it’s a little odd how some of the seeds have taken so long to actually become grass, but it’s still doing well overall. I managed to find a Dendrobium orchid at Lowe’s reduced to five dollars because the flowers had gone, which is a $20 savings, heh. A few days later walmart got a shipment of Orchids… $10 for some rather large ones, so I picked up two; a white phal with two spikes and a purpleish phal with one spike. The white orchid did blast a bud, bleh… but the others seemd to be doing well, thankfully. The begonia was looking a bit sickly, just not very attractive, so I relocated it to the dining room table, heh.
Anyway, I guess that sums things up.