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I have this habit of living within my own mind sometimes, totally aware of everything happening around me, yet doing nothing about it… because I’m debating the next course of action.

Sometimes I can be sitting there mulling over something rather important, other times it’s something as inane as needing to go pee. I can’t really explain it, but it’s just sort of funny how I’ll debate with myself over something like that.

It used to be, and in some ways still is, a question of regret… not for something like wanting to know where the toilet is, but for other more important things… and I’ll ask myself, if I don’t do it, if I’ll regret it if not having the chance again. That usually motivates me to do it.

Sometimes though, it’s as if I’m no longer myself… It is as though I see myself through my own eyes, doing something, and I haven’t any control over it anymore.

There are instances of this for which I remember quite vividly, of course I feel no real cause to document them. It’s just interesting how sometimes I find myself just doing something, intellect loses control and I’m either blurting out something I’ve longed to say… but have always had some fear of saying it, or likewise where I found myself doing something I’ve been equally afraid to do.

Nothing has occured to really make me think of this, it just kind of came to mind as I sat down here, and, well, that is that as they say.