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I was fortunate to view a rather haunting film lastnight titled Endgame. The storyline revolves around a London rentboy abused by who is essentially his pimp. The general storyline and characters found their way into my subconscious apparently, filling my dream vividly. Upon waking I barely remembered anything clearly… I stayed in bed, eyes closed, for perhaps an hour to rebuild as much as I could.

My house was full of people, mostly from the movie, some from my own life, some seemingly random unknown filler. I was seemingly involved with the rentboy, I remember the two of us in a near constant state of body contact — hugging generally. There were quite a few candles lit around the house it seems… and I remember something regarding dinner… perhaps this was some sort of bizzare dinner party of sorts. I remember a general air of confusion and oddness permeating everything. I came into my room to get something, perhaps my camera… and I noticed a purple liquid everywhere… grape juice! I think that might have gotten into the dream after heavy research into grapeseed oil for soapmaking purposes. The rentboy said something to the effect of how he knew I wouldn’t mind the spill… I was annoyed. I went downstairs to David’s room… there were two sets of bunkbeds… he and his girlfriend were in one… and davey (I guess this is where the violence portion of the movie invades the dream)… oh I should mention that davey was walking around the house during all of the dream up until this point… always ignoring me as he has done for the last many months. In the movie-esque manner I pull him off the bed and proceed to rip away his “shell” — and then continue to beat the life out of him with intense vigor.

UHm, yeah… I suppose that’s more on the nightmare level…. like the movie, when given the opportunity, it was taken to release pent up agression.

I can’t blame television interference on this one, because I conveniently turned it off before going to sleep lastnight. I feel like it’s a blend of personal issues and random unrelated sci-fi programs, haha.

First off I’m aboard the starship voyager [insert laugh], but it’s been reduced to about the size of the actual model used to film the show… but that also means so have I and all the other people. Of course the crew of the ship has been replaced with the people from Farscape… mostly the evil miltary people.

We’re trying to escape… we being some girl, I’m not sure who exactly… this boy that sort of morphs between childhood Matt, Eryk, and Davey randomly… which is freaky enough on its own really… and myself of course.

So this girl and I find our way into a Star Trek Next Generation version shuttle… but can’t figure out how to make the transporter work… and these soliders are chasing us, so we go ahead and close the door and leave morphing boy behind… even though we tried. So we’re out of the ship… only to find that these mini-sized ships are actually in our neighbor’s yard… previous to the newish house built there… and when we exit the shuttle we regain our normal size, so that shuttle actually would fit in our hands. Somehow we get back in, not using any sort of amazing shrink ray or anything… and keep trying to work the transporter to get morphing boy.

I guess we manage to get him, but in the process also get the guy that had abducted him.. sort of reminds me of that commander from farscape… Kraise I think his name is. I suppose this is where you insert the movie-esque quick romantic/sexy reunion followed by mad dash escape sort of deal.

We’re in the front yard of my house and somehow both morph boy and I have these giant swords… Morph boy stabs the guy in the lower back… and I stab him through the chest… so he’s quite obviously dead… I ask Morph boy if the guy had fucked him, he said yes… so I sliced off that guy’s dick, hah.

Very strange indeed.

I had gone to Texas for some reason, I’m not really sure why, other than the obvious. I barely remember most of this now, I should have written about it earlier. We were somewhere, a school perhaps, college more likely, hard to say. I guess I’d gone there to find Davey so we could talk, well, I did find him and he gave me the normal sort of cold shoulder for reasons unknown to me. I guess I kept trying to talk to him… and eventually we found ourselves alone. I suppose this dream makes it all too easy and simple, but anyway, it was the usual tv-esque kiss and make up deal… pathetic as it may be.

I had a dream this morning involving davey… there was a lot of randomness, but I remember being with someone that I guess we both knew. It was in a parking lot, out in this sort of ‘dead’ shopping center. I saw davey walking by, between these parked cars, I guess me and this other guy were leaning up against on, sitting… I guess the other guy called to him and he sort of stopped for a moment until he saw me, then started walking again… avoidance. I remember reaching out my hand… I’m not sure what the point of it was, but he moved just far enough away at that moment to be out of reach… and then he turned around and kept walking… I remember feeling so silly when I asked him if he and I could talk… he never even replied.

I had another dream similar to that of yesterday about my dad… but this time there was none of the screaming and waking up stuff.

The second dream is more interesting… There’s a bit of a time flux here, because it involves Davey and me in the future, but I have the job I had back when I moved from Pittsburgh to here, working with credit cards. Also, apparently I’m able to compress eight hour flights into eye blinks, hah.

So, there was this guy, maybe late twenties, and for some reason he convinced me to go to Rome, or rather Italy in general, so I said sure, great idea, I need a vacation. So, there we were, instantly-ish, in Italy… but I apparently had everything that I needed with me. I was in some sort of hostel type room with a shared bathroom… oh yeah, I guess Andrew was there with me in that room… because that older guy walked in on us, haaha… There were more people there too, I remember using the 8mm DV type camera and realizing that I forgot the battery chargers for the video and still cameras. He wanted me to go for a walk with him, so I did… We talked about some stuff and then ended up at this place, where we had to enter through the window. There were two girls there doing something, it was kind of like a stairwell, but the flooring on the landings was very wobbly and the stairs were the open type and that made me nervous, so I left. I’m walking down this road/path, sort of old style roman road I guess… and my cellphone rings, I answer, it’s this woman from work.. apparently I forgot to tell anybody at work that I was going to Rome, hahaha. So there I was instantly back in Hagerstown at my work. I had to fill out this huge 4″ stack of paperwork for some reason, it annoyed me. So I dropped that off at my desk, bitched out the woman that called me, made mental note to get my battery chargers, and of course forgot to to that… and we were instantly back in Italy again.. somehow.

So, back at this wobbly staircase place…. then I apparently told that guy I would meet him and those two girls at the hostel later on… because I didn’t want to use those wobbly stairs, at the bottom of the building there were all these really narrow corridors all tiled with mostly blue and some white tiles, it was really strange, strange enough for me to not want to walk through them… so I walked around the building, which turned out to he huge. Finally I made my way around and ran into the other people on this walkway, and then we met back up with everybody else.

There were quite a few of us, sitting around in this room… and behold, I was right next to Davey… Which I simply couldn’t believe, he was a bit dodgy with his eyes whenever I’d look at him… but considering I was right next to him, that was difficult…. I turned a bit, put both of my arms around him, asked if he would be willing to talk later (about our relationship — apparently despite all the other unrealistic things he was still, err, we were still how we are right now I guess… ), he was… I kissed him on the cheek, he smiled a bit… it seemed like things were going to be okay from then on…

I guess this is where my subconscious decided to stop torturing me and I woke up.